Meant to Be Press


Progress, Not Resolution

Champagne and confetti by torbakhopper

Progress, Not Resolution
by Lela Bay

Did you ever wish that you really could start over at the New Year? That your old life would be whisked away, and you’d wake up after champagne toasts, covered in confetti, with the absolute certainty that your life this year will take you closer to your dreams? Of course you do, because you’re an optimist! Change means opportunity, and the truth is that every year does bring change. We have to be willing to see it.

Arguably a blessing or a curse, we’re constantly building on what came before. Your history is part of the person you are, but it doesn’t define the limits of who that person can become. When the New Year hits, it’s a good time to take stock of the components in your life that are working, and the ones that hold you back. However, don’t give up family, abandon friends, and ditch your pet on a street corner on a whim. Ask yourself what you’d like to be when midnight strikes a year from now and the ball drops. Will next year’s toast be to the person you left behind for a better self?

The appeal of a New Year resolutions is that it has a natural beginning and finish line. One strong commitment can change an element of your life you were never satisfied with. Change doesn’t have to be as difficult as we pretend. Sometimes, it’s all too easy. Lots of articles talk of diets, removing toxic people, and tightening belts.

Here’s a novel change of perspective: instead of cutting someone off, denying calories, or restricting budgets, maybe we try growing, enlarging, and luxuriating. We can seek to expand our circle of friends so we don’t rely on the same old relationships in the same way. We can make cooking or trying new foods a hobby, determine to find a new favorite dish, or focus on the stuff we really love to acknowledge what we want in our bodies. Finally, when it comes to budgeting, it is often more about identifying what matters and what’s just a drain, so there’s balance in expectations, and plans for a bright future that satisfies them.

Most times, the problem is that we fear losing what we have for an uncertain reward. Will we really feel better about ourselves a year from now? Focus on feeling better now, being generous and kind, and acknowledge that this is next year, and we have to feel better right now.

Since fairy godmother doesn’t work holidays, she’s not going to show up midnight on New Year’s and wave her wand. You can still get the happy ending you deserve by seeking progress, not resolution.


About Lela Bay

Lela Bay is the author of Ruined Reputations. She lives in a modest house in a modest town with her husband, children, and pets. Despite living so far north, she requires a certain amount of sunshine each day or she gets grumpy. Her hands are always cold, but her heart is warm. When she isn’t writing, she enjoys strolling, gardening, reading, and tea time with friends. Music has always been a large part of her life, and she owns a ridiculous number of instruments. Lela’s favorite romance authors include Laura Kinsale, Jennifer Cruise, and Jane Austen. She enjoys stories with intimacy and humor. Favorite movies include Overboard, All of Me, North & South, Pride and Prejudice (miniseries with Colin Firth, please), The Princess Bride, and While You Were Sleeping. On television she is a fan of Grey’s Anatomy, Downton Abbey, and Miss Fisher’s Murder Mysteries. She frequently contributes movie and entertainment reviews to Meant to Be Press. Follow Lela on twitter @bay_lela


This entry was posted on January 4, 2019 by in discussion topics, Lifestyle.
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